“Eli! It came in today!” Riley shrieked in her excitement as Eli opened his front door.
In Riley’s arms was a sizable package, that she shook in his face. Eli smiled as he opened the door futher to let her in the house.
“So, what’s in the box?” Eli asked.
“Glitter!” Riley replied as she walked past him, “The last piece of the puzzle to finish the glitterbombs.”
“I see,” Eli said, shaking his head. “Why are we doing this again?”
“Because you love me,” Riley replied over her shoulder as she walked through the room into the kitchen.
“Wait,” Eli said, shutting the front door before following her. “That’s a big box. How many of these are you planning to build?”
“Only a couple hundred,” Riley replied with a smile as she opened the basement door.
“A couple hundred!?” Eli repeated. “That’ll take a week to get set up at least.”
“I thought you were working on the triggers for me?” Riley asked, looking up from the bottom of the stairs.
“I was, but I’ve only made about two dozen,” Eli replied, walking down the stairs behind her. “They take time to get set up, and I wasn’t sure how many you needed.”
“All the glitter bombs!” Riley cried as she set the package down on the workbench of Eli’s shop.
“Is that what’s in the box over there?” Eli asked, pointing to another large box in the corner.
“Maybe,” Riley replied, “They are small boxes, so they won’t take up very much space.”
“How are you planning on mailing these? Do you even have enough money?” Eli asked.
“They only cost about three dollars a piece to mail. I’ve gone through my babysitting money and I should ahve enough. If not, they will be ready to go,” Riley replied.
“Alright, then I’ll start making more circuits, I guess,” Eli replied, pulling his chair over to the work bench. “We’ll see how many I can make with what I’ve got for parts.”
“There are more in here,” Riley said, opening the box she had been carrying.
“You bought more?” Eli asked.
“I mean, I know you love your little electrical projects, but I doubted that you had this much around,” Riley replied.
“You’re insane,” Eli replied, shaking his head as he looked into the box at the packs of batteries, small electric motors, and switches. “How did you even know what to order?”
“The Oracle told me,” Riley said, “You can find almost anything on the internet.”
Over the next few hours, Riley set up fifty of the small boxes on a spare table that Eli had produced from under the stairs, and glued the parts together to contstruct working glitter bombs. They tested them a handful of times before opening any of the packages of glitter.
“Is that what I think it is?” Eli said, as he picked up one of the plastic bags.
“Penis glitter,” Riley beamed.
“How did you even get this?” Eli asked.
“You didn’t know that you can order custom shaped glitter? This stuff was easy. I didn’t even have to customize it, I just went to a party supply store website that offered bachelorette party supplies,” Riley replied.
“Incredible,” Eli said, unable to hide the smile on his face.
“They also had straws, candies, banners, anything and everything you can think of that’s penis shaped. I think I have some ideas for Ethan’s next birthday party. I think he’ll find it funny,” Riley said, picking up a bag of glitter.
“Double-check everything before you start pouring,” Eli said. “My parents won’t be happy if the basement gets covered in penises.”
“I got this,” Riley replied as she began pouring glitter into the packages.
“I have two hundred done now,” Eli stated, turning from his bench.
When Eli turned he saw Riley’s face had become a mask of concentration.
“How’s it going?” Eli asked, walking over to the table.
“I should be ashamed of myself, let’s be clear, I’m not, but I should be,” Riley said, a smile spreading across her face as she continued to pour the penis shaped glitter into the next container.
“There are so many things going through my head right now, the least of which is the level of shame you should be feeling,” Eli replied. “Can we just finish this so I can get on with my life? Emily is waiting for me.”
“Fine,” Riley huffed, “Did you double-check all the circuits?”
“For the fourteenth time, yes, I checked them. The triggers are ready as soon as we set them up,” Eli replied. “I wouldn’t have thought that the engineering courses I took last year would be used for this, but I suppose this isn’t the worse idea you’ve ever had.”
“It might be,” Riley replied, “at least for now. Sending every anti LBGTQ representative a glitterbomb, might actually be illegal. I’m not entirely sure.”
“You didn’t say you were sending them to representatives!” Eli said, “Why’d you have to tell me? Now I can’t deny knowing anything!”
“Hey, this is the life you chose when you became my friend,” Riley replied, shrugging.
“Remember not to connect the battery packs until half of the box is closed, so the motors don’t spin. If you do, we’ll both be covered, okay?” Eli asked.
“I got it!” Riley replied. “You start closing them up, and taping them. I’ve got address labels in my backpack.”
“How are you getting these to the post office?” Eli asked.
“I was planning to schedule a pick up,” Riley replied.
“I think the best course of action, if that’s your plan, is to get them all to your house first. I don’t want these things traced back here. I can’t imagine what my parents would think if police show up to arrest me for these,” Eli said.
“It’ll take so much longer to get them out then!” Riley protested.
“I’m not going to jail because you decided to pull a prank on government officials,” Eli said. “I love you, but I’m not sure that I love you that much.”
“Okay,” Riley said, sounding slightly deflated.
A week later, news outlets reported the glitterbombs in nearly every paper. Riley had never been so proud of herself as she watched the news. The doorbell rang, and when she opened it, two men in black suits looked down at her with severe expressions.
“Riley Joyce?” the one closest asked.
“Yes?” Riley replied.
“I’m Agent Franklin, We need you to come with us,” he said.
“Fuck,” Riley whispered as she nodded and walked out of the house.